Friday, May 28, 2004

I Love Me Some Contests... 


These were the 5 words that Collin asked us to all use to make a story in the "comment window" on his blog. 1,000 characters or less, folks! I've always had a hard time keeping things short and to the point, I remember years ago, when I was in elementary school or junior high, Wonka® ran an essay contest of some sort where you had to write about, if I remember correctly, a "candy-related" historical figure...It was supposed to be kept to 250 words or less...I started penning a very poignant story about a hard-candy dictator who set to cleanse his candy factory and was especially harsh toward "chewish" candies...I ran over 250 words WAY early...So early, in fact, that I decided it just wasn't worth it to tell this particular story in so few words, so I quit...

The story that I concocted for Collin's little contest is as follows...I had to edit it down a few times to meet the requisite 1,000 characters or less requirement, but I don't think it lost much impact...Frankly, it didn't have any to begin with...

By the way, voting is going on NOW at Collin's site...
It's times like these, waking up in a fog and in a strange bed, that I think I should reevaluate my drinking habits. I'm unable to recall when, where, how much I put away or with whom. I'm know only that my head hurts, my mouth tastes like a pickle, my tongue feels like a peach and whomever I'm sharing this bunk with is completely foreign to me. They also smell quite foul.

I'd leave, but I have no idea where I am. It's dark, I'm unaware as to the layout of the room and, as I mentioned before, I have an enormous headache which isn't helping...If I could...Hey, what the Hell...Is this even a bed!? What is this...I've got a string tied around my toe...Dammit, it's feels like I'm in a drawer! WHAT IN HELL IS GOING ON HERE!? ow, Jesus, what's on my cheek? It feels like a boil, it's, OH MY GOD, IT'S ATTACHED, I THINK IT'S MY EYE! WHY WON'T ANYONE ANSWER ME! Maybe if I rattle this thing...OH GOD, I CAN'T MOVE! WHY CAN'T I MOVE!..

Oh, Jesus...I can't move...

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