Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Say, Dog, What're You NOT Barking At?.. 

Similar to my post from November, 2005 about Terrell Owens and also a lot like Fart.jpg and (one of my personal favorites) Farted.jpg, my post from last week about Judge Roy Pearson garnered hundreds of search hits for the ol' blogsitething. Hell, if you searched for the judge's name via Google, Son of Cheese was on the front page of results within an hour of the original posting. Goddamn, Google must like me...Anyhow, unlike the Terrell Owens post, the Judge Roy post wasn't picked up and linked by any major news outlet (certainly due to my gratuitous use of foul language) and unlike the two farty pictures, most of these search hits didn't yield too many page views or "time spent." Hell, out of the hundreds of hits I received thanks to my poorly crafted rant, I ended up with a mere 7 comments, all from people whom I know. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining. I just find it interesting...

And speaking of "interesting..."

I think I've mentioned before that some of the things which my mother will blurt out while we're playing cards or board games are instant blog fodder gold. A couple of weeks ago, it was the bear hibernation butt-plug thing (which, as it turned out, she was right about). This past Saturday, while we were all playing a rousing game of Uno Hearts, we got to talking about Carson, the pansy-ass, I'm-afraid-of-thunder dog which belongs to Collin and my sister. After talking briefly about how much Carson the dog barks at things, my mom said, bluntly, "I heard somewhere that dogs won't bark at retards."

We were stunned. I personally nearly fell off my chair. Hey, also, if your hand's bigger than your face, you have cancer...

Now, I'm fully aware that dogs have a keen sense of smell. Hell, certain breeds, it's said, have the unique ability to sniff out cancer...But mental retardation? Does that have a smell? Is it similar to "fear," which I was always told that dogs can smell as well? And hey, why WOULDN'T the dog bark at the slow kid or chase the short bus? Does the dog not want to alarm these unpredicatble people? Please to enlighten. I wonder if this post will get me search hits...God, I hope not.

Anyhow, I just thought that little snippet was worth sharing. You kids have a fine Tuesday now and remember: if the dog isn't barking at you...Well...

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