Thursday, July 06, 2006

Phrickin' Photoblog Phriday-Stinkin' Zoo... 

And now...The end is near...And so this week faces...It's final curtain...Why? 'Cause it's FRIDAY, fool! That's right, kids, it's the end of the workweek and that means that you're about to be treated to (yet another) Phrickin' Photoblog for your viewing pleasure! Now, before we get started with today's picturey exhibition, I probably should take a quick second to remind all of you that I, personally, really frickin' hate the zoo. Hate hate hate. I don't go to the zoo EVER.

With that said, today's pictures were taken at the zoo.

Now, before you get all "you LIAR" on me, the pictures you are about to see were taken by my wife who, because she's one of them "school teachers," has to make regular trips to the zoo so that the smallish, school-aged children in her class may escape the crushing bonds of poverty and despair (and stuff) and see a Zebra or a Penguin for the first time in their pathetic, miserable lives. Sounds like fun, yeah? Good, here we go...
click=big. Real easy.

Awww, wook at the widdle wallably!
We begin our zooey photoblog today with a picture of a CUTE LITTLE WALLABY! Oh, look at how cute the little wallaby is...Remember though, cute or not, like Rolf Harris said: "they're a dangerous breed, mate." So don't let his CUTE WIDDLE FURRY FACE fool you and don't get too close: he'd strip your bones clean!

It's a motherfucking MEERKAT!
Wow, look at that! It's one of them damn MEERKATS! Boy, doesn't he look happy to have his picture taken...Sitting up and everything. As you can see from the reflections, these little bastards are kept behind glass, probably for the same reason that the wallaby was in a cage...They'd just as soon kill you and eat you as look at you...

Stupid Peacock...
Here, though, we see the regal peacock, strutting unfettered through the zoo, going where he pleases, not bound by the constraints of a cage...I assume that the zoo folk let the peacock run amok because they're LESS apt to kill or maim than, say, the mountain lion or the gorilla. Myself, I wouldn't be so cavalier about the whole thing...Those frickin' peacocks are MEAN...

Holy Shit! Giraffe!
Holy shit! Giraffe! Dammit, I hate these things...They...they're the stuff of NIGHTMARE! Hey, seriously...My nightmares often involved large, awkward creatures eating crackers from my hand...eww, they're just DISGUSTING...Moving on...

Everybody loves the birds of prey!
Now HERE'S the only reason that I might ever considering going back to the stupid zoo...Yes, kids, it's the noble vulture! I love the vulture because he appears constantly pissed-off. I guess, though, that scavenging for corpses and subsequently gorging yourself on dead flesh WOULD BE grim business so...He has a reason to exude despair...I LOVE YOU, VULTURE!..

Screw off, deer!
And we will end our zoo-themed photoblog with a picture of an animal which is NOT a zoo exhibit. Indeed, this here is one of the many stupid deer which wander around near the zoo. And by where I work. And in the road. These damn things are always darting in front of cars and stuff...Good thing they taste good when you cook 'em up...Mmmm, deer!

So there you go, kids: a virtual trip to the stinkin' zoo...As always, thanks for stopping by: you all have a fine weekend!


This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?