Wednesday, May 26, 2004

Now, Where Did I Put That Safety Harness... 

I was driving home the other day and happened to notice a sign on the highway here in town that said, rather polietely I should add, "Please buckle up." It followed this gentle request with the phrase "Click it or ticket." I'm sure that this catchy little phrase is in effect all over these great United States, so this should be nothing new to most of you...I personally have no problem with the concept of buckling up and driving safe, so I wasn't swayed by this sign. After all, I was already fulfilling it's request. I started thinking, though, that the use of the word "please" was especially gentle and I was not sure that it sent a firm enough message across to those drivers who WOULD drive unbuckled, which should certainly lead to their dying a horrible, scrapy, asphalty, burning type of death...Being the proactive problem solver that I am, To reach these previously unreachable, I unveil my idea for a better, and firmer, seatbelt sign campaign:

What a clear message! Urgency combined with scathing insult! I'm sure the DOT from all 50 states will be clamoring to print these signs at a most rapid pace! I shall simply sit back and wait for their calls...

I'll also think of more ways to improperly implement exclamation points into my writings(!)

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